Elements of Gravity
by The Cowardly Christian
Summary: Princess Wendy is having a bad day. Her sister betrayed her, the kingdoms in ruins, Her family scattered to the winds, the Elemental Warriors lost...How could this day get worse? "Never ask that princess." Says a young human boy...
1. Chapter 1

Elements of gravity

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Okay, this was getting ridiculous! Shouted princess Wendy to herself as she fought through the troll castle. Spinner trolls, sphere trolls, fire trolls, bomber trolls, spawner trolls, giant trolls, cannon trolls, slasher trolls?!

Seriously, who comes up with this crap!?...Well, whatever. She was in the throne room now...There were the ancestors! And her mother! Kalus was torturing them!

Wendy cracked her knuckles eagerly. Well, one good thing came out of this whole mess; she got to finally knock her bratty sisters block off! She began to step away from the statue she was hiding behind and-

 **CRACK!**

Suddenly everything went dark...

…...

When she woke up she was back home in the Enchanted Kingdom...Being yelled at by the Mystic! Wendy groaned. Like she'd really sit around and wait for some dumb book to be repaired while her family was being ripped apart!

Still...she had to admit things were bad...The troll king Thorn had returned with his army, the elf armies were losing ground fast, the entire royal family(except her)was gone, and apparently her last three elemental Warriors were taken!

No, not a good situation at all. And now she has to convince Ortho of her "worthiness!?"...She wondered if she could get away with burning a small part of him...

…...

She was starting to think these two had gotten senile. Her "test" had consisted of looking around, flapping her wings, and kicking the warrior trainer in the face!

Well, whatever. she wasn't going to question an easy win...

…...

Alright, things were looking up! The portal to the shadow realm was apparently nearby! Finally! Some good news!...Or as good a news as can be expected learning a doorway to a dead land filled with shadow trolls is in your backyard can be anyway...

…...

Man, these Shadow Trolls were stupid! They stood around like morons and sent minions after her that were made out of their weakness? Wendy smiled with satisfaction as the Shadow troll exploded!

And there was Pumelweed! Already in it's Elemental Warrior form! "Wow, great work Ortho!" She exclaimed. Ortho however looked uneasy within the WotNot Book.

"That...wasn't me! But that's impossible! No sprite has the power to become a warrior without me!" Wendy shrugged unconcerned. "The shadow troll must've done something or whatever." She said nonchalantly as she walked up to the giant plant.

"R-right...Yes...T-that has to be it!" Said Ortho...Although he didn't sound so sure. Wendy walked up the warrior and began to summon her transformation energy that would assimilate the warrior into her being-

 **ZAP!**

Wendy cried out in pain as she dropped on all fours. "Wha-what the hell just happened!?" She exclaimed. Ortho frantically fluttered around. "I-I don't know!" Exclaimed a very disconcerted Book.

"This is completely unprecedented! It seems as though something is wrong with the royal transformation magic!"

Wendy groans. If it wasn't one thing it was another! She sighed. Oh, well at least they had Pumelweed back- Wait where'd it go?

She quickly looked around just in time to see the warrior jump through the portal back to the Enchanted Kingdom! "Wait, come back!" She shouted as she and Ortho chased after it.

When they left, two beings appeared. "See? What did I tell you?" Asked a teenage boy. Thorn nodded impressed. "Alright, I got to give credit where credit is due. You were right on both accounts...I guess I won't kill you today then."

He says half-jokingly as he snaps his fingers and summons a large number of trolls. Thorn chuckled. "They won't know what hit 'em!" Dipper Pines nodded as he watched the trolls get ready to pour into the still open portal to the Enchanted Kingdom...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **AN: I know it says "in-progress" but really I just don't like boxing myself into a corner. For now this is more of a one-shot that I might continue one day...but probably won't.**

 **But, hey. Feel free to use whatever elements you want from this, if you want! Or maybe give me ideas?**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	2. Chapter 2

Elements of gravity Ch. 2

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

 _I hate my life._ Thought Wendy to herself as she fought an increasingly uphill battle. She didn't know what had happened!

One moment they'd been chasing Pummelweed, the next they were trying to protect citizens from an all out Troll attack! There were over a dozen Shadow trolls slaughtering the local militia.

Later Wendy would wonder why these guys were stronger than the first. To which; the Mystic would later explain that the reason that first troll had been so easy to beat was probably because it had just arrived in the shadow realm to restore it's deeply depleted essence.

But right now however Wendy's only thoughts were: _Holy $ &#&$^%! I'm going to $#&% die! _For these Shadow trolls were fully replenished and at the peak of power! They could reanimate the recently deceased to fight for them, they could summon kamikaze flaming skull demons, swarms of elf eating bats, and send out explosive shockwaves!

Worse, since "lost souls" could only be found in the shadow realm. That meant no light energy. Which pretty much made them invincible now!

Wendy grunted as another shockwave sent her flying. She was in such pain when she landed she couldn't move! She watched helplessly as three times as many regular Trolls tear apart the kingdom while the Shadow Trolls distracted the guards.

 _Well...That's it...a hundred generations of royalty ends with me. I've failed everybody...maybe if I just lie here my death will be painless-_

 **THORN! YOU LYING BEAST! YOU PROMISED THE KINGDOM TO ME!**

That scream and the sight of her enraged sister was the last thing Wendy experienced before everything faded...

…...

When Wendy woke up she was being nursed by the mystic. She immediately thrust into a good news, bad news, Better news, Worse news situation.

The bad news: Pummelweed used the commotion to escape the kingdom and they don't know where it went.

Good news: Klaus appeared and destroyed the Shadow Trolls in a fit of rage; this allowed the guards to take the fight to the regular trolls. Which actually wasn't that hard. 3/4th's of them were a new type of weak Troll that exploded into powder when punched.

Worse news: before they were taken down the trolls burned or bombed every building downtown. And urinated all over the farmlands. Thus rendering the crops dead and inedible, and the soil hopelessly infertile. Oh, and they also burnt down all the libraries. Be they public, private, royal, or secret. The greatest collection of magical knowledge gone forever!

Better News: The Troll City was in chaos! Details were still sketchy. But it all seemed to boil down to: Thorn agreed to do something with the kingdom with Kalus, apparently how he invaded had somehow broken that deal with her, so she became enraged, briefly helped repel the invasion, and flew away to do battle with Thorn!

This brightened up Wendy considerably! If they were lucky maybe they'll off each other! And then she realized that the Wotnot was missing...

…...

Ortho screamed as the Elemental Warriors combined their magic with Dippers machines to destroy him and the Wotnot. Mind, body, and soul.

Dipper smiled as the book was reduced to ash. He smiled even more as he heard the distant but loud sound of Kalus and Thorn wale on each other. _Everythings going according to plan._

Thought Dipper as he begins to read one of the many books he stole from the enchanted Kingdoms library...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	3. Chapter 3

Elements of gravity Ch. 3

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Wendy quickly decides to not mention the loss of the Wotnot. Word had somehow gotten around that she was the one that left the portal open that let those trolls in, and the people were not happy.

She didn't even want to think what would happen if word got around about her losing the Wotnot! She did however know she needed to tell the mystic about her malfunctioning transformation magic.

Needless to say...She wasn't thrilled! And made sure everyone knew it!

"Well, isn't this just fantastic!" Shrieked the mystic sarcastically. "It seems your little excursion to the Troll City didn't just cost you your few remaining elemental warriors, but your transformation magic as well!" She just shakes her head.

"Really great job your doing, just wonderful!" She snarks in irritation.

Wendy ignores this jab and asks: "so my magic was stolen?"

The Mystic shook her head. "More like half-stolen. Whoever did this was very clever. They knew that stealing all of it would be an exercise in futility due to the ancient protections interwoven within it. But apparently they exploited a loophole that bypassed the whole thing by only stealing half of it. It's useless to them, but now it's also useless to you."

Wendy couldn't believe what she was hearing! "But without the transformation magic, how will I restore the Elemental Warriors?"

The Mystic waved her hand dismissively. "You let me worry about that. Right now, just focus on getting the rest of those Elemental Warriors and your family! Your sister and Thorn fighting give us the perfect opportunity! We mustn't waste it!"

The Warrior Trainer coughed nervously. "It...Might also be best if you left the kingdom for awhile...Given the current mood of the people." He admitted reluctantly.

And on that Cheery note. The Mystic used her crystal eye to divine that her uncle Halis was trapped in an ancient temple deep within the Forgotten Forest. She also sensed several Elemental Warriors there. Quickly, Wendy went to the Badlands...

…...

YOU! Shouted the captain of the guard the instant Wendy appeared in the Badlands.

"What the Devil happened up there!?" He says while pointing above to the floating island that made up the Enchanted Kingdom.

"The last thing the boys need to worry about right now is whether their families are in peril!"

Wendy tried to calm him down. "Look there was a...situation. But now it's over, were fine now." She said, deciding it best to not go too into detail...Or how she was to blame.

The Captain looked at her questioningly. "It had better be over! The situation down here is grim enough as it is! We've already lost most of our elemental shrines! We only have three left! I hope I don't need to remind you that not only do these shrines power the kingdoms defenses; but are also the only thing keeping the Kingdom in the sky!?"

Wendy desperately tried to reassure the Captain that everything was under control. The Captain wasn't convinced, but he still helped her be escorted to the Forgotten Forest...Which of course was under attack!

Wendy groaned. _Why am I the one doing this? My family has a freaking army at their command for crying out loud!_ Complained the Princess to herself as she charged forward.

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	4. Chapter 4

Elements of gravity Ch. 4

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

-But to Wendy's surprise, she wasn't really needed. The plant people were already being defended...By the elemental warriors!

Wendy couldn't believe her eyes! Almost all the elemental Warriors were here! And they were curb-stomping the trolls! And they weren't alone! Someone appeared to be leading them!

It seemed to be an...elf her age?...no, wait. The ears were wrong...Oh! He's a...What are they called? Oh, humans! That's it!

She watched as the human boy her age effortlessly led the Elemental warriors to victory against the Trolls!

The plant people celebrated them! Wendy just stood there stunned. What on earth was going on here? The plant people then declaring that they were severing their alliance with the elves didn't help matters!

"Wait, what!? What are you guys talking about!" She shouted as she walked over to them. And was surprised when she found herself being glared at with hostility!

"Well, if it isn't the royal family; late as ever!" Wendy looked at them confused.

"What are you-" Suddenly she was barraged by a load of angry shouting. And was shocked by what she heard! Apparently only a small contingent of elves had been sent to protect the Forgotten Forest...And most of them spent most of their times getting drunk!...Granted that the liquor and prostitution revenue was doing wonders for the local economy...But that's hardly compensation for their homes being ransacked!

Wendy was horrified! How could this have happened?! And it hit her...if her family was capture...And she was out here rescuing them...Then who was running the kingdom? How was it even functioning!?

Wendy put these questions on hold as the plant people began to talk about the human. Apparently not only had he spent the last couple weeks defending them from the trolls; but he'd also introduced the concept of aqueducts, sprinkler systems, and green houses! Oh man did they love the green houses!

It also didn't hurt that the boy was chosen by the elemental warriors to be their new champion! "Whoa! Hold it right there! There's no way that's true! Elemental Warriors can't "choose"-

 **TO HELL WE CAN'T!**

Wendy was now very pale...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	5. Chapter 5

Elements of gravity Ch. 5

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Wendy looked at the Elemental Warriors in disbelief. "Y-you can...You can talk? What is- When did-"

The human coughed. "Perhaps we should move this talk somewhere more private?"

Still in shock from this revelation, Wendy could only nod. They quickly walk to a nearby hut where the Elementals tell all.

They tell of how her distant ancestors after wiping out the Sargothans and stole their transformation magic...Then went to Enslave the Elemental Warriors.

That's right, enslaved them! They hunted them all down and took away their voices, their free will! And then sealed them away in that blasted book!

The elves then forced them to give the benefits of their power to the elves and only the elves!

This ensured that the Elf lands and surrounding areas enjoyed great power and prosperity...But the rest of the world became lifeless, inhospitable, dreary, and without a drop of magic to it's name.

"-Now wait just a minute!" Interrupted an irritate Wendy. "My family would never have condone this!"

Pummelweed nodded. "No, they wouldn't have...Unfortunately, the first royals of the elves thought it best to keep the truth of the matter to themselves. They made the spells that locked our will and bound our power to their lands self-sustaining and took this horrible truth to their graves. And so all the many generations that came after them continuously enjoyed their prosperity; oblivious to it's ill-gotten origins."

"At least until your parents!" Admitted Rubble. "Although they sadly never learned about us. They did however become aware of the plight the rest of the world suffered because of their decadence; as well as the fact that hoarding the magic and health of the world would inevitably bring about a great cataclysm-"

Cataclysm!? Exclaimed an increasingly disturbed Wendy.

Major Ruin nodded. "Yes, even had we never been released a couple generations down the line the world would have "balanced the scales" so to speak. Bringing down a great cataclysm on elf-kind to restore balance to the rest of the world. Your parents tried their best to avert this. Sharing the magic and prosperity with the nearby Plant tribe, fish tribe, Snowtop tribe, And(before Thorn's Betrayal) even the trolls!"

"Alright then!" Interrupted Wendy again. "So were good then? Every things fine!"

Flex gave a bitter sweet smile. "Your parents actions didn't hurt...But I'm afraid that it was a simple matter of "Too little, Too late." You elves have simply been on top of things for far too long. Taking too much and giving back so little. Just as there must be bad harvest years to keep the ground fertile; so must there bad years for an empire...And your empire is far too long overdue. Your father Solono knew this and sacrificed himself to have you."

"-Wait, what!?" shouted a horrified Wendy.

And so it was explained to her that Her father seeing the hopelessness of the situation. Willingly gave his life for Wendy to be conceived and brought into the world.

Both as an instigator of a smaller, more survivable(thus replacing the inevitable larger cataclysm)cataclysm; and as a leader of the elves who will be given the opportunity to save them in the aftermath of said cataclysm.

And by telling his wife none of this; but instead that she would be the savior of elf-kind. He assured that her mother Theena would lavish attention(and eventually the Elemental Warriors) on Wendy and not Kalus.

Thus setting in motion Kalus's betrayal and Thorn's return to power. Thus willingly sacrificing his kingdom and family's stability to further increase the elves chances of survival.

Wendy took this news as well as could be expected...

 **FAINT!**

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	6. Chapter 6

Elements of gravity Ch. 6

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

Wendy rested inside the hut. Desperately trying to make sense of all these new revelations...it felt like someone had peeled away a layer of her brain...and her reality was no longer anchored to any point of reference...and it felt like she was about to be crushed by a new unforgiving paradigm of ultimate reality...

And that's when she noticed the human sneaking out of the hut. _Huh, I'd completely forgotten about him._ Thought Wendy to herself.

She'd been so completely swept away by the truth behind her shameful heritage...She'd forgotten to ask who he was and what part he played in all this. Curious, she followed him.

While she did so, she desperately tried to remember all she could about humans...Which wasn't much. All that's known; is that they are an aboriginal race of primitives that lived in squalor deep within the uninhabitable wilds of the Badder lands.

Many had assumed they'd gone extinct. Wendy pondered this as she continued to follow him...

…...

Dipper finally got to the clearing. _Not a moment too soon, my illusion was fading fast._ He thought to himself as he carved the necessary runes into the enchanted stump.

Taking a quick look around to make sure the clearing was still isolated. Dipper took off his amulet and put it on the stump to recharge.

Suddenly, where once stood a smartly-dressed teenage mature revolutionary; now stood a scrawny 12 year old with an eyepatch, a weird broken seal glowing on his stomach, and only wearing a loincloth.

Dipper then went to double check the energy matrix-

When he was lifted up by the scruff of his neck by a smirking elf princess.

"Ordinarily I'd be furious seeing the stolen half of my transformation magic on someone else's chest...but seeing it on a dorky shrimp like you(snort) it's all I can do to keep from laughing!"

Dipper turned crimson. "Put me down! And I'm not a shrimp!" He shouts as he struggles to break free. Which unfortunately for him dose nothing but cause his loincloth to slip off.

Wendy couldn't hold it in, what she now saw made her burst out laughing!

"(snort) Your absolutely right!(giggle) Shrimp doesn't do you justice!(cackle) I've definitely seen shrimps bigger then that!(snort)"

 _Of course, the one time a troll isn't around to eat me..._

Thought a mortified Dipper.

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	7. Chapter 7

Elements of gravity Ch. 7

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

-And so Dipper explained how he'd began his journey from his mudhut a year ago, After his twin sister Mabel died of scarvy(a disease easily cured by the elves...Not so much a backward tribe of people who have no magic).

Irritated by how his people suffered, he rode to the Enchanted Kingdom to beg for magic...Only to be captured by trolls on the way over.

He became their slave. His weak appearance came in handy here, as the Trolls didn't consider him a threat.

He took advantage of this to steal reverse wood from there stores, grind it up, and put it in their beers.

This reversed their inherently cruel nature, and Dipper quickly became their leader.

He'd built up a small following before Thorn returned. He then gained his trust by helping plan out the Shadow Troll invasion of the Enchanted Kingdom, and the creation of the Plague Trolls.

"-Plauge Trolls?!" Exclaimed a horrified Wendy.

"It's not as bad as it sounds!" Said Dipper quickly. "That new "weak" Troll type you thought? The one's that crumbled to powder?...They just spread a non-lethal disease...That renders elves incapable of using magic...also their children...Not their Grandchildren though! They should be fine!"

Wendy just gives him a nasty look...Which doesn't last long since staring too long at his scrawny body just makes her laugh.

An embarrassed Dipper took this as a sign to continue.

It was he who convinced Thorn to break his covenant with Kalus. It was he who told Kalus about it. It was he who took advantage of the chaos that followed to liberate the Elemental Warriors, destroy the Wotnot book to free them permanently, and make a covenant with them to make humans the next dominant species on earth through the sacrifice of his eye(the Elemental warriors had actually been willing to skip that bit out of gratitude. But Dipper insisted; he didn't want to take any risks with magic that old and powerful. Which the Warriors respected.).

Now he was protecting the tribes(under the pretense of convincing them to sever their ties to the Enchanted Kingdom, making it weaker). All the while he was continuing to "convert" more trolls to his cause, he had at least 1/10 of the trolls secretly under his leadership now, and it was growing!

Dipper sighs. "Look, I have no animosity toward your people. I am simply trying to do right by my people...I hope you can forgive me...Or at least give me back my loincloth." He asks awkwardly.

Wendy frowns...She thinks about it and finds that no matter how hard she tries...she really can't mad at him. He was just trying to help his people(she could respect that), not to mention the whole "allow lesser calamities to befall the elves to prevent a bigger calamity thing"...But mainly, it was impossible to stay mad at a boy with a body that scrawny...And genitals that tiny.

Wendy smiles and gives his loincloth back. "Would you prefer a smaller size? That loincloth looks way too big on you." She playfully teases...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


	8. Chapter 8

Elements of gravity Ch. 8

I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!

…...

After some more talk. They came to an agreement. Wendy would allow Dipper to continue to dissolve the elves alliances to both further gain Thorns trust and bring about one more smaller calamity for the elves thus further diluting the possibility of a greater calamity.

 _It is not okay that I'm now relieved about calamities occurring to my people._ Thought a conflicted Wendy as she contemplated her messed up situation.

Still it wasn't so bad...Dipper was a nice guy...also it was nonstop entertainment teasing him about how 'scrawny' he is...and stealing his loincloth.

Dipper, although embarrassed; lets her do what she wants. Considering how badly he was fraking over her kingdom and people...He was getting off pretty easily.

Anyway Dipper explained that they were still missing 3 elemental warriors. All of them hidden within her captured relatives. After Thorns betrayal; Kalus took them from him and hide them where she could eventually extract the elemental warriors.

After much experimentation they figured out a way to merge themselves to reactivate the transformation magic. Since Wendy had more experience she was given the 'drivers seat' so to speak.

After using Rubble to smash the eyes of the cyclops trees, the secret path to the forest temple was revealed.

And Dipper and Wendy were off to save Halis and Ash!...

…...

TO BE CONTINUED?

 **Also don't forget to give a shout out to my mom's birthday story on my page!**

 **Love me, flame me, review me**


End file.
